No Pain No Gain

If you can't tell, this is supposed to be a 1000X magnification of my bicep. Don't you love it after a good work out when you're sore in muscles you didn't even know you had? That's been the unintended theme of my week.

Torture

Why does Obama want to shut down a resort? What? The Bush administration took suspected terrorists there for surfing excursions? That's just plain wrong. Is it torture because terrorists prefer skateboarding?

Fun Size?

Nothing. And it takes a special kind of crazy to think you can convince the American public otherwise.

Check List Check List

These should be the first items on any checklist. They provide much needed momentum right when you need it.

What would you do?

As far as I can remember I've never had a Klondike Bar for this very reason, but after trying to draw one, it actually looks pretty good. I think I'll buy a box, and if I don't like them, I'll walk around seeing what I can get people to do for my leftovers.

Global Warming

You can call me naive, but global warming seems like something everyone should be hoping for.

Common Ground

I knew I shouldn't have run on a pro-genocide platform.

Teachings

I actually LOVE vegetables. I just never buy them...or eat them.

Weeds

They're all fun and games, until they end up in YOUR yard.

Earl-aye in the Morning

I also forget what I better not do when Santa Clause is coming to town.I always figure a little bit of pouting is fine, only to find a lump of coal Christmas morning. Darn that list. If he only checked once I could probably slip by.

A Calorific Dream

Carl's Jr should start doing this. They could charge over $20 for a burger, fries, and a shake! And when you use a coupon it means they leave off the bacon.

Disappointment

"At 5 o'clock tomorrow look East. Don't forget your swimsuit and a jar of quarters.You're not gonna want to miss this."  THAT'S the kind of fortune I want to see. 

Career Advice

In addition to having access to delicious chocolate, the name "chocolatier" is just so much fun to say.

Psych!

Mark-Paul Gosselaar will be his Secretary of State, and Mario Lopez will be his Secretary of Defense.

One Simple Goal

So what's with the sticky notes? I just draw on sticky notes sometimes and then post them on this blog. There's not much more to it than that. I hope that some of them are funny...occasionally...late at night...when everything's funny.

I accomplish this goal by running away screaming whenever I see one. It has worked so far. Knock on wood.

Cultured

This is why my wife can't take me to parties.

Coinage

I just call the dollar coins "vending machine tokens". Other than drawing circles, it's the only use I've found for them.

Box of Chocolates

I sold my soul to the devil for a crate of chocolates.They all had nuts. I'm allergic to nuts. Silly devil can't get anything right.

Pseudo

I've already been pseudo-nominated for a pseudo-pulitzer.

Productivity

"I wrote a book on overcoming illiteracy. My publisher said it needed more pictures."